If you are in a complicated relationship, it is only complicated because you are allowing it to be. Throughout our lives we are taught that relationships are complicated. We are taught to build up walls, to play games, to protect ourselves. Whether we do so because we have been hurt in the past, or we do so because we are afraid of being hurt, the result is the same. We never learn to truly love or to be loved.
In any relationship there is a natural give and take. The give and take, however, should be natural. Most of us operate on an equableness scale where we need to feel loved as well as we love. The problem with this notion, however, is that you can never control how much someone loves you, or how much you love another.
You will always find hurt in a relationship and there is always going to be inequity at times. Learning to love unconditionally, not based on some equity system, will free you to just feel love for someone else without feeling restricted, or analyzing their love for you.
What is the worst that can happen if you have a failed relationship? I will bet you that for every relationship lost, there is another one that comes along to take its place. You’re life may seem empty at first, but there is always another soul that comes along to take that spot.
It is not that you are going to find someone that you love the exact same way, that is impossible. It is exactly the difference that makes our lives rich. You will never find someone to replace the love lost, but rather, someone that will enrich your life in other ways. That is the beauty of connecting with another human being.
If, however, you are always concerned about giving too much of yourself, giving to another human being more than they are willing to give back…If you are afraid of getting hurt, you will never truly learn to love or be able to give all of yourself to another. It is a lonely way to live your life.
If you have never truly allowed yourself to love unconditionally, to give free of the fear, than you have never truly felt alive. Learning to let go of the fear of loving with your heart and soul will give you fulfillment beyond your wildest dreams and desires.
This site is given to you to share my insights as a health practioner, Development Coach and Mentor. Having had over 20 years of experience.
I have so much to share with you if you are willing to listen. I hope you enjoy the blog as much as I do. Be the best you can be and life will surely be wonderful.